Friday, December 28, 2012
Pink - please don't leave me lyrics
So I'm driving down the snowy roads with my kids today. Then I hear this song on the radio for the first time (yeah, I'm a little sheltered)--and I'm just stunned. This is the perfect insight to a Borderline Personality Disorder. "You're my perfect little punching bag." "How did I become this obnoxious? What is it about you that makes me act like this?" "But baby I don't mean it, I promise."
I told my kids, this is not how love acts and you should never date this, let alone marry this!
When you're raised by someone with problems you get this thing called "fleas." They are these little mental health ticks that aren't you--but are bits of learned behavior that can come out in stressful situations. I've got Borderline Fleas and Narcissism ticks. It sucks. Cleaning up ticks and fleas off yourself is unpleasant work.
I've got to say, I'm 100% grateful for the Eucharist. The wisdom from the Holy Font is true. There is no way I would have ever figured out that respect for my husband is paramount--especially whenever I'm feeling unloved, unappreciated, or abandoned. My new mantra is "I can get angry without getting mean."
That's what respect is to me. I'm trying so hard not to be mean. Not to take the cheap shot. No nitpicking, or sighing loudly in another room or rolling my eyes. If there's a problem in my marriage, I need courage to talk about it openly and honestly.
Surprise. When I try my marriage God's way, my husband and I can talk about really deep problems together We can actually come up with solutions--from more romance to getting cheaper heating bills. When I pray to be more respectful--I'm less obnoxious--and more things start changing for the better.
Oh Pink. I love you, woman! I'm praying you into the Catholic Church along with Taylor Swift and few dozen other song writers I'd love to sit in the pew with during Daily Mass.